peer_circle


	addthis ...


	A child’s personality & character is shaped by ...


	X %


	GENES - that’s nature


	Y %


	PARENTS - that’s nurture


	Z %


	PEERS ... should they be plain luck, circumstance or fate ...?


	Countless studies, theories, essays and more have been published on the influences that make a child the individual it will grow up to be. Which factors decide on the kind of woman or man it will be, what forms its character traits and its ability to manage life?

At Parental Pals we are convinced, that this split of genetic, educational and environmental factors has no given percentages - their power differs from child to child.
To give the element “Parents” support and backing is one of our key elements. Just as relevant however is the need to pay attention to the PEERS, who shape the juvenile perception in areas where parents are not accepted as true authority!


	In her very controversial book “The Nurture Assumption” (publ. 1998) Judith Rich Harris says “"Parenting has been oversold. You have been led to believe that you have more of an influence on your child's personality than you really do." A Newsweek article titled “The Parent Trap” gives an analysis for interested readers who have not read the book. Judith Harris's big idea - namely, that peers matter much more than parents - ran (in ‘98) counter to nearly everything that a century of psychology and psychotherapy had told us about human development. Freud had put parents at the center of the child's universe, and there they had remained ever since.

	peers matter !

Steven Pinker wrote in his foreword to the book:

“For one thing, the biological interests of the parent and the child are not identical” ...

“It makes sense that children should take their calories and protection from their parents, because their parents are the only ones willing to provide them, but that they should get their information from the best sources they can find, which might not be their parents.”


	Parental Pals have conducted a detailed survey amongst 5000 pre-registered members. One of the most important findings is the fact that an overwhelming majority of 92% of all mothers and fathers who participated said: “We want to play a much stronger part in the definition of the peer groups our children socialize with.”

Parental opinion is stated quite unanimously:

* we cannot control everything and everybody, nor would we want to

* we do want to take influence on the kind of people our kids socialize
   with, to a sensible degree and with all possible discretion

* we want to bring peers into play from outside the usual social circles
   to help create a wider mental horizon and a broader set of values

* we want to accept our own children and their friends with a
   maximum of trust and influence their peer group structure not by
   force, but by offering opportunities they don’t want to refuse

* we want to be part of our children’s social life to a degree that
   allows us to detect harmful peer influence and react if necessary

Peers are doubtless a very powerful force, their influence shapes the definition of what’s cool and who’s a nerd; where it is desirable to belong and what can be safely dismissed as a waste of time.
To guide juvenile opinion-forming as subtly and efficiently as possible it is a good idea to look out for ways to influence who the peer groups are.
Parental Pals open up ways to create new circles of friends who help to ensure that youngsters end up neither lonely nor as part of a group of mindless trend followers.


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